Pmr Essay Writing

 

English In Camp 2013 : Guided Writing

Format Of A Letter :

1.

Informal letters are

written to friends & relatives

.2.

The format:Your address__________________, ____________________________, ____________________________.Date________________________ Greeting,Opening_______________________________________________________________  ___________________________________________________________________________ Contents_______________________________________________________________  ___________________________________________________________________________ Closing________________________________________________________________  ___________________________________________________________________________ Signing off,______ Signature________ 3.

The

language

used is

simple and friendly

.a.

You can use contractions such as

can’t 

,

 I’m

,

won’t 

,

 you’re

and so on.

b.

For examination, do not use slang like,

“Hey, Wassup.” , “gonna” , “kinda”, “wanna”

4.

Explanation about the format:

Format Explanation

Address

The writer’s address is written at the

top right-hand corner

For example:25, Jalan Tebing 8/8,Seksyen 8,40000 Shah Alam,Selangor Darul Ehsan.Date

Written

below

the

address.

For example: 6 June 2011Greeting

Written on the

left-hand side of the letter

. Begin with:

Dear........, For example: Dear Amin, Dear Latifah,

Dearest…….., or My dear…., (for close friends & family)For example: Dearest father, My dear Uncle Syed, Dearest Siti,Opening(1

st

paragraph)You may begin your letter by:

Asking about the person’s health. For example:

How are you? I hope that you’re in the pink of health.

Salam and Hi,

A student sent me an email, asking my help to check a recount writing. For more information about a recount, you may visit this website: Recount Writing.

The original essay:


Last holiday , my friend and I went on a trip at Ulu Ayam Waterfall.We gathered at bust station early in the morning. The journey there took an hour and half. It was my first trip together with my friend.


Everyone was so excited with this trip. We brought the snacks and drinks from home. Upon arriving there we we're serve by the scenic view of hills and forests. It,s really make me impressed. The bird chirping and the sound of the waterfall made me feel in peace. Ulu Ayam Waterfall was a famous for its beautiful recreation park among tourists.


We do many things there . We hiked the hills, swimming at the waterfalls and many else. As we swam at the waterfall, suddenly rain started pouring. We ran to find a safe shelter. It, s funny and fun to see a few of my friends run trying to save the foods that had been wet because of the rain. 



After a few minutes, the rain stop pouring. We had a small barbecue near the waterfalls. We rested for a while after eating. Before we went home we hiked up the hills . We found many unique fauna like a wild orchid. We went home in the evening. We feel really sad leaving the Ulu Ayam Waterfall . While in the bus, we all agreed to come again there. Although it was tiring, it was a precious and fun trip.



The corrected essay:

Last holiday, my friends and I went on a trip at Ulu Yam Waterfall.We gathered at the bus station early in the morning. The journey there took an hour and half. It was our my first trip together with my friend.

Everyone was so excited with this trip. We brought the snacks and drinks from home. Upon arriving there we we're captivated by the scenic view of hills and forests. The beautiful scenery impressed me. The chirping of birds and the sound of the waterfall made me feel at peace. Ulu Ayam Waterfall was famous for its beautiful recreation park among tourists.

We do many things there. We hiked the hills, swam at the waterfalls and many more. As we swam at the waterfall, suddenly the rain started pouring. We ran to find a safe shelter. Itwas funny and fun to see a few of my friends runningand trying to save the foods that had been wet because of the rain. (..the food was wet because of the rain.)

After a few minutes, the rain stopped pouring. We had a small barbecue near the waterfalls. We rested for a while after eating. Before we went home, we hiked up the hills. We found many unique flora like a wild orchid. We went home in the evening. We felt really sad leaving the Ulu Ayam Waterfall. While in the bus, we agreed to come again there. Although it was tiring, it was a precious and fun trip.

Band/Mark: C – 14

Comment: Not bad. Need to work on your grammar. Keep writing. You’ll improve.

Additional comments:

1) The meaning of "together with"

  • in addition to 
  • in association with

2) Serve

  • to give (food or drink) to someone at a meal, in a restaurant, etc.

3) feel in peace is incorrect.

  • Correction: feel at peace or feel peaceful

4) We hiked the hills, swam at the waterfalls and many more

Explanation: Use the same tense.

  • We hiked the hills, swam at the waterfall, played ball, collected pebbles and had a picnic. (for this essay, a correct sentence structure uses all past tense verbs)
  • We hiked the hills, swimming at the waterfall, played ball, collecting pebbles and had a picnic. (this is an incorrect sentence structure because different tenses are used)

5) Be consistent:

  • How many waterfalls are there in Ulu Yam?
  • If there is only one, write "waterfall".
  • If there are more than one, write "waterfalls".
6) Fauna means "animals"

One thought on “Pmr Essay Writing

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *